By Kristy Pate, United Way of West Florida
Pensacola, Fla. - United Way of West Florida recently conducted QPR, or Question, Persuade, Refer training for Pensacola Habitat for Humanity.
QPR is a free training program offered by UWWF to any local organization or school. QPR is not a form of counseling or treatment but is an intent to offer hope through positive action for those who are struggling with mental health.
“We wanted to equip our programs staff with the skill to navigate heavy, emotionally charged phone calls from local customers,” said Stephanie Nellusm, Community Development Associate for Pensacola Habitat for Humanity. “I’ve received many calls where customers were suicidal or in survival mode due to not having a habitable place to live.”
Nellusm said they wanted to ensure their staff is trained to handle situations where survivors are suicidal due to trauma, unmet basic needs, or other circumstances.
“We felt it was essential for our staff to have these tools to best serve our customers and support one another, while helping to prevent suicide, burnout, and compassion fatigue,” she said.
According to the National Institute of Mental Health, the U.S. had one death by suicide about every 11 minutes in 2022. For Americans aged 10-14 and 25-34 years, suicide was the second-leading cause of death. More than 950,000 youth aged 12-17 and 1.6 million adults attempted suicide. This same year, there were twice as many suicides (49,316) in the United States as there were homicides (22,830).
“So many people still believe common myths about suicide or misunderstand how it can present, which often leads to warning signs being overlooked,” said Jillian Gulley, Homebuyer Pipeline Supervisor for Pensacola Habitat for Humanity. “QPR increases confidence by replacing uncertainty and fear with awareness, language, and a clear plan to help people move from not being sure what to do to knowing how to help, what to look for, and how to guide.”
There is often a misconception that asking a person about suicide will only make them angry and increase the risk of suicide.
“The reality is, asking someone directly about suicidal intent lowers anxiety, opens up communication and lowers the risk of a suicide attempt,” said Donna Bliss, Community Impact Coordinator. “Suicide prevention is everybody’s business, and anyone can help prevent the tragedy of suicide. That’s what QPR Training is designed for. You don’t have to be a licensed clinician to save someone’s life.”
QPR training addresses many myths related to suicide. One common myth is that people considering suicide keep their plans to themselves. The reality is most people considering suicide communicate their intent sometime during the week prior to their actual attempt.
“What QPR training boils down to is you don’t have to be a professional to save someone’s life. You just have to be someone’s 15 minutes,” said DJ Kint, Veteran Care Coordinator for the Florida Veterans Support Line.
With regards to mental health, all signs should be taken seriously. The more clues and signs that are observed, the greater the risk for that individual.
“Pay attention to all of the clues,” Kint said. “Direct and indirect verbal clues, behavioral clues, and situational clues. If someone says, “I’ve decided to kill myself,” that’s a direct verbal clue that should be taken seriously. Sometimes they aren’t as obvious, but you have to trust your gut. And pay attention to that person’s actions.”
Situational clues like a previous suicide attempt, being fired from a job, loss of financial security or the loss of a major relationship should also be considered.
The QPR Institute offers a 3-step plan if individuals exhibit these signs and become concerned for another person. The first step is to question the individual, directly or indirectly, but always with compassion.
“In the past, I have tried three different times to commit suicide,” Gulley said. “The most recent attempt, I drove to Pensacola Beach and I knew I was going to kill myself. I was sitting in my car in the parking lot and a police officer came and knocked on my window. He asked what I was doing and I said I was just sitting there because I had just been going through a hard time. Then he asked if I was ok. If it hadn’t been for him, I wouldn’t be here today.”
Gulley said that at the time, she wished people around her would have recognized her withdrawal from things she enjoyed as a sign that something was wrong.
“I wish they would have recognized that I no longer was mentally and sometimes physically there for things that I used to be there for,” she said.
After QPR Training, Gulley was able to validate the power of the simple training through her own personal experience.
“I believe it’s so important to slow down and truly make space when we ask someone, “How are you?” Sometimes people just need time to respond honestly,” Gulley said. “Someone once became my ’15 minutes,’ even though it only took about five. In those few minutes, they saved me from making a decision that would have cost me the life I never imagined I could have.”
The second step of QPR is to persuade the person to stay alive. Most of this is done through active listening.
“Listen to them and give them your full attention,” said Bliss. “Remember, suicide is not the problem, only the solution to a perceived insolvable problem. If they don’t want to open up and talk, that’s ok, don’t push them. Encourage them to stay safe in the moment and be an active listener.”
The final step of QPR is to refer the individual to someone or someplace that can help them. The best referral involves taking the person directly to someone who can help. The next best referral is getting a commitment from them to accept help, then making the arrangements to get that help. The 988 line is an available resource that is accessible any time.
Any willingness to accept help at some time, even if in the future, is a good outcome, Kint stressed. Gatekeepers need to step up and take charge if needed. They need to be bold because lives are stake.
“At that moment in my life, I was ready to make a decision based solely on my circumstances and I couldn’t see a future beyond them,” Gulley said. “But because that officer took the time to sit with me and talk, I was given a glimpse of hope for a better tomorrow. I’ve now lived 2,284 tomorrows, and I’m deeply grateful for every one of them.”
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Organizations or schools interested in requesting QPR training should reach out to Donna Bliss at donna.bliss@uwwf.org or DJ Kint at dj.kint@uwwf.org